Yep, I’m Still Hanging Out
It’s kind of an odd paradox I’m in. On one hand, I feel good and everything is going well. I’m able to spend time with the kids and do things I couldn’t do over the summer. You would think I’d want this time to last. But on the other hand, without further treatment, my cancer will come back. Not may come back, but will come back. Guaranteed. Take it to the bank. So I need further treatment. And further treatment means this time of feeling good must come to an end.
So the hard part is knowing I need further treatment and knowing I have to wait. Acute leukemia patients aren’t used to waiting. In many cancers you have to wait for an appointment. Wait for a PET or MRI. Wait for results. With leukemia you can get a quick blood draw, see your life flash before your eyes, and then move on to treatment. If you don’t move on, you’ll be dead in weeks, so it’s usually best if you do. I know my time is coming, so I’m trying to enjoy my current state. But truth be told, I’d rather just be admitted tomorrow and start the SCT process.

